where do you run to when there’s no one to find you? i’m going nowhere fast. well, i was hoping and praying that you would find me and that everything would be alright. you’re my best friend and my life line and my god forsaken time bomb and you light up my fucking world until there’s no more sun.

am i just wasting my time?

trying to find a line in this circle

trying to find a break in this cycle

sitting, waiting, hoping, 

hopeless ties to a hopeful life

tell me, am i?

just a small-town girl 

living in a lonely world

she took the midnight 

train going straight to 

hell

i tried to think of how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

i talked about your eyes

and your smile

and your laugh

and the way you always

knew how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

i talked about your heart,

and how it is so big.

i talked about your voice,

and how it stays the same.

i thought of how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing

close to a year ago.

you left to find your life

and your smile

and your laugh

and how to learn to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

you left to find your heart,

and why it felt so small.

you left to find your voice,

and why it changed so much.

i read this poem of how i say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing

close to two years ago.

you came back to find me

and my smile

and my laugh

and how i thought to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

you came back to find me,

because i was still here.

you came back to find me,

because i was at home.

you read this poem of how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing

the day you came back home.

you read about your eyes

and your smile

and your laugh

and the way you always

knew how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

you read about your heart,

and why it is so big.

you read about your voice,

and why it stays the same.

you asked me how to say

‘i love you’

a thousand different ways,

meaning the same thing.

instead of going back

and reading through the poem,

i looked at you and said

‘i love you’ just the same.

a small cry for a small price

the post-apocolyptic life of a teenage wasteland

bought from a store off the corner of main

with problems and hardships and a fucked up taste

we will look for a million stars up in the sky, and when we find them, they’ll attract a million eyes.

He pulled me into his office and then,

One question. Two questions. And then silence.

It was cloudy out, I remember this—

The birds were still, the flowers not missed.

I looked up at him and he turned his head

Away from me; astray, his eyes were led.

He faced me once again and took a breath.

His voice was calm and quiet nonetheless.

He asked me things about my life at home.

I opened up, and said I didn’t know.

I told him about my sister’s abuse;

The advice he gave me could have some use.

It all flowed from his lips as separate words.

The room was silent, the one thing I heard:

“We accept the love we think we deserve.”

her only friend is a boy named jak. she was six, he was seven. every day he would come to play; two hours pass and she walks him home. at the door, they stand there waiting. he goes inside and shuts the door. as she leaves, she hears a scream. he asks for help but no one is there.

her only friend is a boy named jak. she was eight, he was nine. every day they would take a walk; two hours pass and she walks him home. at the door, they stand there waiting. he goes inside and shuts the door. as she leaves, she hears a yell. he asks for help but no one is there.

her only friend is a boy named jak. she was ten, he was eleven. every day they would go to the park; two hours pass and she walks him home. at the door, they stand there waiting. he goes inside and shuts the door. as she leaves, she hears a curse. he asks for help but no one is there.

her only friend is a boy named jak. she was twelve, he was thirteen. every day he takes her out; two hours pass and she walks him home. at the door, they stand there waiting. he goes inside and shuts the door. as she leaves, she hears a crack. he asks for help but no one is there.

her only friend was a boy named jak. she was fourteen, he was fifteen. every day they go to school; seven hours pass and she walks him home. at the door, he gives her a kiss. he goes inside and shuts the door. as she leaves, she hears a shot. he doesn’t ask for anything this time.

her only friend was a boy named jak. she is sixteen, he’s long gone. every day she prays for him; two hours pass and she goes to sleep. in her dreams, she sees him there. he comes near and kisses her cheek. when it’s time to go, he asks for a simple request: “take me home.”

i always sit in the dark because it’s the only time i can really hear myself think.

you’ve never raped me or hit me, but you don’t tell me you love me, and that hurts just as much.

it hurts to be this far away from you. all i want is for you to be happy with me.

i feel like i’m stuck in a story where the hero doesn’t win in the end.

my mother can’t look at my scars because she doesn’t want to admit that i’m not perfect.

if i ever fall into a lake, i want to know that all of this pain won’t make me sink.

it bothers me when people say i shouldn’t do certain things to myself because i’m beautiful. what does beauty have to do with anything?

the words “i love you” don’t even come close to how i feel about you. you’re my everything.

i tend to find beauty in everything. if only i could find it in myself.

that one night in the hotel, you told me, “i treat girls with respect. that’s how i was brought up.” i’ve never heard another guy say something like that.

you’ve hurt me more than anyone else in the world. but somehow, i can’t forget about you.

it’s so weird seeing you in the hallways at school, knowing that you used to have your hand down my pants.

my sister caught me looking at lesbian porn one day. the look on her face was priceless, but the look on mine was even better.

you intimidate me and i’ve never even talked to you. i think you’re the most gorgeous boy i’ve ever seen.

i drink alcohol right after i take my prozac because it makes me forget that much more.

you cheated on me twice and i forgave you. i should’ve been mad at you but i wasn’t. why did you feel worse about it than i did?